Movie Review: Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Warning: Minor Spoilers

Ok so I saw Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen last night at midnight (at least, it was supposed to be midnight, but after the biggest line I've ever seen at a movie theater flooded in and found seats, it was at least 12:30 when the previews started).  And it was epic.

Transformers is one of those franchises that has such a huge following to begin with that a studio could almost slap any piece of crap together and throw it on the screen and make a killing.  But luckily, they didn't choose that route.  Instead, they manage to craft an incredible action movie with breathtaking special effects that should keep both fans and non-fans of Transformers well entertained.  

I'm sure the first thing you're wondering about with the new Transformers is: "How's the action?"  Well, I have to say, it was PHENOMINAL.  This movie seriously blew my expectations away with its intense action scenes.  Some of the action scenes are so well shot, animated, and completely breathtaking that it really has to be seen to be believed.  I know we've seen CGI creatures beating the crap out of each other in like every action movie for years now, but Transformers manages to take the whole thing a step further with some truly incredible blend of live action and CGI.  The shots are also great at showing off exactly how massive these giant alien robots are.  And I'm pretty sure this movie should hold some kind of record for most explosions in a single movie, because during the action scenes (which was about 90% of the film), the explosion average was about one every two seconds.  

As far as plot goes, it is pretty much what you'd expect from a movie like this.  The Decepticons are back and once again hell bent on taking over the Earth, and the Autobots are ready to try to stop them.  Meanwhile, the government is trying to pass a law that would make Autobot presence on Earth illegal, believing that their very presence is why the Decepticons are attacking.  It's all very standard for an action movie like this, and the whole government-making-autobots-illegal thing feels like a watered-down Watchmen ripoff.  But if you're walking into the movie "Transformers" for an excellently-written plot that will emotionally move you, then I'm not sure what rock you've been under for the past 30 or so years.  This movie understands what it should be--an action movie--and doesn't make any huge attempts to change that, which is perfectly fine with me.

But this movie is definitely not without its faults.  First off, this movie, like its prequel, suffers from some of the most badly-written, smack your hand into your forehead "love scenes" this side of Star Wars Episode II (and surprisingly, this wasn't the only similarity to Star Wars this movie had).  I have no idea who the person is who keeps approving of the writing on these scenes, but the dialogue between Shia Leboeuf's character and Megan Fox's character is so disgustingly bad written that it really makes you want to throw up.  Its such an obvious tarnish on this otherwise pretty well-written movie that you almost have to wonder why these scenes ever made the final cut.

Secondly, I will not argue with any man, woman, or child on this planet that Megan Fox is absolutely GORGEOUS.  But as absolutely stunning as she is, I can't help but feeling that a lot of her scenes were just way too over the top sexually explicit, especially for a movie rated PG-13.  For example, the first shot of her in the movie really makes you feel like you accidentally just walked in on her having sex with a motorcycle.  There's also a scene not far after in which she literally strips in front of the camera for no real reason at all.  The movie takes it so far that there's actually a tiny Decepticon robot humping her leg for a good minute near the end of the film.  I know sex sells, but I can't help feeling like some of the writers on this movie were a bunch of college frat guys who made every attempt they could to see Megan Fox in less and less clothes in the most sexual positions possible.  If you just took out every shot in the movie that Megan Fox is not in, you would basically have an hour long Megan Fox porno.  While this might be more acceptable in other movies, I felt this was way too over the top for a PG-13 movie based on a cartoon.

This movie was also really, really long.  I thought the movie was almost over at least four times throughout it, only for it to take another turn that felt like it was just to show the robots beating each other up just a bit longer.  Giant alien robots beating the crap out of each other is undeniably cool, but it's like a magic trick--it's really cool the first few times, but every time you see it after that it gets progressively less cool.  There were so many times during the last 45 or so minutes of this movie where I just wanted to shout "END!  PLEASE!!"  Though I have to admit, the final battle was nothing short of spectacular, but I wish that we had just gotten to it a lot sooner.

But in the end, Transformers is, at its heart, an action movie, and a great one at that.  It also managed to be downright hilarious at times.  It's absolutely a movie worth seeing, but I don't think it's one worth seeing again and again and again.  

I give it 3.7/5 stars (yes, I can give it 3.7 stars)

Anyone else who saw it have any comments?  Do you agree/disagree?  Feel free to post your thoughts under the "Comments" section.